Children are a Gift from God

I woke up to the sound of fighting children this morning...BEFORE the alarm went off.  Why children can't learn to stay in bed until Mommy's alarm goes off I don't understand.  Especially since the first thing I hear when I come out of my room is, "I'm exhausted, can I stay home?" 

The point of me sitting down to breakfast with the children initially was so I could help to prepare them for the day.  "What will you do today?" "How will you behave today?" "What will happen if you do not behave today?" etc.   That point has become moot.

Instead, I end up with conversations such as todays.
Me: "You two need to find someway to co-exist in this house!"
Banana:" What is cope desist?"
Me:"Huh?"
Banana: "What is cope desist?"
Bubba:"It's CO-EXIST, Mom means we have to get along".
Me internally...OOOOOHHHHH co-exist not cope desist bahahaha!
Banana: "I don't wanna get awong"
Me: "Why not?"
Banana: "Bubba is a pain and I don't yike him.  Can I have a new brubba?"
Bubba: "Well thanks, YOU'RE a BIGGER pain."
Me: "Ok you are BOTH pains...now lets move on...and no we are not getting you a new brother Banana!"

I go on to explain they children are a gift from God to both parents AND siblings and they should treat each other as such.

Banana: "What's a such?"
Bubba: "She means you have to treat me like I am a present to you and be nice to me"
Me: "Umm, and YOU have to treat HER like she is a present to YOU and be nice to HER too!"
Bubba:" Do you think it's too late to get a refund?"

*sigh* I wish I was a rabbit.